Weekly Communication · Issue #019

Todd's Dispatch

TH
Todd Howard
Game Director & Chief Vision Officer, Bethesda Game Studios
Issue #019
Week of September 15, 2026
The Definitive Horse Has Been Found

Hi. Todd. I am trembling. We have found it.

"It is not the best horse. It is the definitive horse. You cannot ride it. You cannot feed it. You may only regard it, and be regarded in return. We are told this is the future of equine design."

After four years, the Horse Research Division has concluded its review of every horse in recorded history and delivered its finding: the definitive horse. It is a single, perfect photograph of a horse, taken in 1987, which we have purchased for an undisclosed sum and framed in the lobby beside Dave's cave. The Equine Safety Pass will still apply.

The division has been disbanded. Its members have been reassigned to the fog, which welcomes them.

Todd Howard
Lead Horse Researcher (Emeritus) & Keeper of the Definitive Photograph
Parody. The definitive horse is fictional. The 1987 photograph is also fictional, and magnificent.